We start with a narration that tells of a nuclear test on an island. We see Godzilla, Rodan, and Anguirus getting annoyed by the explosions. The credits just appear and we see a kid playing on stupid looking water toys.

We see two other dudes relaxing and an earthquake from the explosion. The kid can’t get back to shore alone so they shoot a rocket at him so he can grab on. Then we see the ocean…freeze and explode I guess? Oh no…That’s not for another season! They bring the kid back in and the idea that they brought a missile and 50 feet of coiled rope to a picnic is goddamn hilarious. They we see them driving off and listening to the radio. They’re back at their house and we find that their house was broken into. We have no idea what the relationships are so we can assume they’re a gay couple that adopted a kid. Some people broke into their house and tried to beat them up, but our heroes won as the robbers/assaulters drive off. One of the dudes follows them as the other finds that their robot Jet Jaguar is fine. Jet Jaguar was designed by a contest winner for a monster movie. He looks like Ultraman, but Jet Jaguar is so cool. He was originally supposed to be star of the movie, but they put Godzilla in the movie to get more of a box office.

Back to the car chase. While swerving around at the speed of sound something explodes and our hero lost the villains. There was sand scattered around the house and we see that the sand is red and white. They destroy the button and they start doing massive work to finish Jet Jaguar. The guys who broke in stuck a microphone in their house so they can spy on our heroes. The kid drove off on his comically tiny toy car and got captured by the villains and is forced at gunpoint to let them into the house. The villain shoots them with a knock out spray and they take Jet Jaguar. We see that masterminds are an underground civilization that’s being disturbed by the nuclear tests. They worship the titular monster Megalon as a god. The nuclear tests have made destroyed a third of the villain’s underground country so they wage war against Earth by begging Megalon to help them. It does and Megalon looks so cool. A giant rhinoceros beetle, with drill arms, and fold out wings. Badass! It flies/drills to the surface and we see out heroes being tied up and captured.
Megalon
One of our heroes is left to help control Jet Jaguar. The underground dwellers are called the Seatopians and they need Jet Jaguar to control Megalon. One of heroes escapes and leaves to save his friends who are being sent to execution. One car chase later and Japan starts mobilizing to defend against Magalon. The captured heroes are dangling off the edge of a truck so Rex Dart Eskimo Spy (he’s our other hero that chased everyone around in cars) saves them. Rex Dart drives off just as Megalon destroys the dam and floods the area. Megalon smacks the storage case the other two are in and it goes flying! They land safely and are still alive. Rex Dart finds our other heroes Roxane and Goro (I think that’s their names. I just pieced it together). The military attacks Megalon and guess what. It does jack. Actually they do fine and stagger Megalon for a while until he busts out his special moves. Megalon shoots napalm bombs out of his mouth and he shoots lightning out of his horn. Badass! They intercept Jet Jaguar and regain control of him. They send Jet Jaguar to get Godzilla from Monster Island. In the mean time the Seatopians ask for help the Space Hunter Nebula M Aliens and ask to have Gigan assist Megalon in the destruction of Earth. This is sadly only one of three movies to have Gigan (the others being VS Gigan and Final Wars) and this is the only movie with Megalon. Megalon goes berserk due to a lack of a control and starts attacking a group of planes. There is a hilarious shot where they show Megalon swipe at a plane, but they use stock footage of Gigan’s hook claw from Godzilla vs. Gigan hitting a plane. Actually they use that shot several times. Megalon is always hopping around everywhere instead of flying or walking. Jet Jaguar contacts Godzilla and he brings him to fight Megalon. He supposedly told him to stop Megalon and save the people, but knowing Godzilla he’s just being territorial and doesn’t want some underground monster to wreak havoc on his lands or he just wants a good fight. We see a hilarious shot of Godzilla cannonball into the water and start swimming. We see some footage of Megalon destroying Japan and Godzilla we get to see Godzilla still swimming. He’s not close or anything he’s just still swimming. As if to say, “I’m on my way. I hope I’ll be able to save at least ONE building!” So Roxane and Rex Dart Eskimo Spy go on a dangerous mission to get the Seatopian out of their house. They hit him in the face with a toy plane and they beat the crap out of him. Our trinity of heroes run off and Gigan arrives to aid Megalon via exploding diamond. I love Gigan. He’s one of my favorite monsters. For those who don’t know he’s this large green and gold lizard like monster with a buzz saw on his stomach, hook blade hands, a beak, sort of wings, and a red visor for an eye that shoots a red laser. Badass! He looks even cooler in Final wars when he replaces the green and gold with black and black, and trades his hook arms with buzz saws. Even more badass!
Gigan
Jet Jaguar finally arrives and JJ shows off a new and badass skill. Growing to extreme size so he can fight alongside Godzilla. JJ just karate shops Megalon in the face and they start their fight.
Jet Jaguar
Gigan arrives and knocks JJ down. They exchange roars, fore arm clanging, and have a monster bro fist by clanging their arm weapons. They knock JJ around and make short work of him until…Godzilla steps in to save JJ. They exchange monster noise and I assume they’re talking about how Godzilla just beat Gigan a movie ago and the formation of battle pacts. Godzilla actually easily handles both of them while JJ recovers. Gigan knocks him down and actually makes blood gush from his shoulder when his chest saw comes into contact. Godzilla fires at him with his fire breath and sends Gigan flying into some buildings. Presumably the home of our trinity of heroes. They pair off with Godzilla fighting Megalon and JJ fighting Gigan. Gigan beats JJ down and almost takes his head off, but Godzilla stops him. Shockingly Godzilla actually takes a heavy beating from the two’s ranged attacks trying to save JJ. JJ flies him and Godzilla behind the two and Godzilla pelts the two with his fire. Gigan tries to flee, but JJ knocks him down and breaks his arms before Godzilla blasts him down after being thrown. Gigan flees before he can be killed leaving a wounded Megalon on the ground. Warning! What follows is quiet possibly the greatest moment in Godzilla history! JJ holds up Megalon, Godzilla runs back, and does a leaping kick at Megalon. It’s not just a jump kick. Godzilla is kept in the air and perpetually in motion by his tail dragging across the ground!

It’s so great they use it for their opening in Season 4 & 5. It’s so great they show a repeat! It’s amazing! Godzilla throws his back into the ground and Megalon drills back into the ground in defeat and shame. Actually the fact that he can still stand is astounding! The Seatopians seal off their entrances and exits to the surface and are never seen again. JJ and Godzilla share a handshake in friendship and Godzilla returns home.

JJ returns to regular size and reunites with his creators. He then sings his theme song. I’m not kidding he has a theme song! THE END!
First skit is Joel and the Bots hosting a stereotypical morning magazine show. Invention exchange for both sides is easy-to-make Halloween costumes. Pretty funny. I love my overly complex costumes that take months to make. Next skit is Tom and Crow covering up their naughty pictures by saying they made up monsters as reference to Jet Jaguar’s origin. They keep trying to one up each other by making their monsters cooler than the other. Next skit is using James Bond style music over our hero in car chases and him being awesome. Declaring him to be Rex Dart Eskimo Spy. Simplicity is amazing sometimes and that skit was funny. Don’t know why, but it sure was funny. Next skit is Crow and Tom perform their own incredibly dark take on Orville Redenbacher commercials. Last skit is Joel upgrading the bots to have their arms replaced by weapons. Crow gets a coat hanger and a claw. Tom has a flamethrower and Swiss army knife arm. Then we see the fake lyric translation for the JJ theme song, which is so funny. They end with a Monty Python reference “What manner of bot are you, who can conjure flame without flint or tinder?” Absolutely amazing! The jokes are fast, funny, and your always laughing. The movie itself is amazing. Godzilla vs. Megalon is my second favorite movie in the series, right behind Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah. It has a slow start, but it flows. The bomb falls; we meet our heroes Roxance, Goro, and Rex Dart Eskimo Spy, we see the Seatopians, we see JJ and Megalon, they save JJ, JJ gets Godzilla, Megalon destroys some stuff, awesome fight scene, the end. The action is always happening and unlike others in the series and the Gamera series theres barely any exposition. We’re shown it all and it’s entertaining. I especially love the fight scene. It’s a long battle with lots of turning points. JJ is winning until Gigan shows up, Godzilla’s appearance and entry to the battle brings it back over the side of good, however when Godzilla saves JJ he’s vulnerable to their attacks, and then they defeat Megalon and Gigan when they strategize. Also that’s another thing I love. The monsters interaction. In perevious and future movies they seem to just sort of tolerate each other or fight each other, but here it seems like an alliance. Gigan and Megalon communicating seems natural for monsters who both want to destroy Earth and they quickly join up and beat down on JJ. Godzilla showing up has more interactions and we can see that Gigan is clearly anger at Godzilla’s arrival and being reminded of his previous defeat. Once again Godzilla saving JJ from Gigan and Megalon is different from when him and Rodan had to be convinced into helping Mothra fight Ghidorah. Even then I still think it was over territory. This time he was impressed by JJ’s stamina and will to keep going so he ricked his life to save a fighter he barely knew. The handshake at the end shows that he respects JJ more than most monsters, as not once does he ever try to fight him. It’s honestly sad that JJ never made another appearance. It would have been cool to see him team up with the younger Godzilla in the Millennium series or even team up with the current Godzilla in Terror of MechaGodzilla. Now I’m just rambling. Go see it! This is an amazing episode and should never be passed up!
Episode Rating – 10/10
Movie Rating – 10/10
Favorite Riff – Tom talking about the fight between JJ and Megalon – “I know I’m supposed to be excited and all, but all I can think of is sweaty Japanese guys.”
Stinger – Godzilla cannonballing into the water.
Possible Stinger – Godzilla’s leaping tail kick or Megalon knocking the crate into the air and it flying off.
Episode – https://vid.me/xk5K/mst3k-212-godzilla-vs-megalon
Trailer – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ws9Qf82luTE (Japanese) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QiPd7DcChZI (American)